He's Just Not That Into You

After spending close to 45 minutes in the parking lot of Schnucks crying, I think I get it now, it's really over. I feel humiliated after I basically poured my heart out, only to be laughed at and disregarded. I am so devastated, because I really had hopes that we could discuss the email in a manner in which I would have a little more insight in regards to our future. But who am I kidding there is no future for "us". I guess the next step is to finally go get all of my things from the house, I must admit part of me is at ease having my things there, but I am really just going to let him go. It's hard and I can feel the lump in my throat forming as I am typing. I know that I am soooo lonely and I really just want someone to be there for me and support me and to tell me everything is going to be ok. I really just feel like nothing I do is right, nothing I say is ok, I feel completely worthless. Instead of typing that email I should have just tried harder to go to bed, because it was just a waste of time, I was completely open, and it got me nowhere. I called the host of the set and told him that I appreciate the experience and all the fun times but I am giving up my membership.  I'm sure many will be disappointed but, I'm so over everything and everyone, I really need to find my path and continue to keep moving without looking back. Next stop: Target to go buy a bunch of boxes of Kleenex...hey I gotta start somewhere.